
Welcome…
Recent television includes: a trip to Benidorm to play Mr Pink, meeting and working with the multi talented comedic actor/stand up comic/writer/quizmaster/total goodguy, Lee Mack in his sitcom Not Going Out and the christmas edition of Would I Lie To You? I say working, they were a joy to be involved in. Work? I’ve never done a day’s work in my life!
Once a week I introduce a television programme called Melvyn’s Talking Pictures on the TV station of the same name, Talking Pictures TV. Thank you Sarah and Noel Cronin for allowing me to talk about the classic films from the 1930’s. I get the opportunity to time travel back to the days of black and white movies and revisit some of the wonderful actors and directors, many of whom I had the good fortune to have worked with, all those many years ago.
Oh yes, I nearly forgot I’ve finally finished my autobiography which has only taken me 36 years to write!
And believe it or not I’ve found someone who wants to publish it.
‘It Aint Half Late Mum’ is the title – to be published by Alliance Publishing Press January 2026 in time for my 91st birthday!
I have been instructed to stay alive for this important event!


It Ain’t Half Late Mum
Melvyn Hayes has spent over 75 years in show business, carving out a unique path from child performer to beloved character actor.
Born in South London in 1935 and evacuated during WWII, Melvyn had his first taste of the stage playing the Gingerbread Man at primary school.
A brief attempt to become a jockey gave way to his first paid role in entertainment – performing magic with The Great Masoni for £4 a week.
His career began in earnest in the early 1950s, leading to repertory theatre, West End productions, and eventually over fifty film appearances. He signed with Associated British Picture Corporation in 1958, starring in films such as No Trees in the Street, Crooks in Cloisters, and the Cliff Richard classics The Young Ones, Summer Holiday, and Wonderful Life. He also appeared in several Peter Cushing Hammer horror films including The Curse of Frankenstein.
In the 1970s, Melvyn won over TV audiences as Gunner ‘Gloria’ Beaumont in the hit BBC sitcom It Ain’t Half Hot Mum. His stage success included over 1,000 performances of Spring and Port Wine in the West End, followed by decades of pantomime and television appearances.
Told with warmth and comedic flair with laugh-out-loud humour , Melvyn’s memoir is full of behind-the-scenes anecdotes, from famous co-stars to flops and odd jobs between roles. He reflects candidly on his personal life – three marriages, six birth children, the adoption of two sons, and the devastating loss of his third wife, Jayne.
Honoured as King Rat of the Grand Order of Water Rats and once the subject of This Is Your Life, Melvyn continues to perform, most recently on Not Going Out and Would I Lie To You?. His story is a rich, funny, and moving tribute to a lifelong love of showbiz.
